1) The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve.
Surprise! Surprise!
It was an Apple.
But with extremely limited memory.
Just one byte.
Then everything crashed.

2) A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”

The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”

3) Harry prays to God: Dear Lord, please make me win the lottery.
The next day Harry begs the Lord again: Please make it so I win the lottery, Lord!
The next day, Harry again prays: Please, please, dear Lord, make me win the lottery!
Suddenly he hears a voice from above: Harry, would you kindly go and buy a lottery ticket.

4) Little Johnny asks his father:
"Where does the wind come from?"
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"I don't know."
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"Why do dogs bark?"
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"I don't know."
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"Why is the earth round?"
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"I don't know."
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"Does it disturb you that I ask so much?"
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"No son. Please ask. Otherwise you will never learn anything."

5) Q: Is Google a he or a she?
A: A she, no doubt, because it won‘t let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas.


Answers to last week's riddles:
1) He is short, so he can't reach the 100th floor button. On rainy days, he can use his umbrella to poke the button.
2) "No," answered the Director. "A normal person would pull the plug."
3) The third room. Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead.
4) Three. He should have said how many letters were in the number he said.
5) He waits until night time and then goes through the first door.